 | Stoopid Girls Dear Stoopid Girls,
Here is some prose I found on the internet.
Live and Learn.
Scientific Fact 8: Your Internet Girlfriend Has Body Image Issues
It took her three months to send you a picture when you started dating. You finally saw her, smiling sheepishly, in a photo attached to an email with the subject line "SORRY THAT I'M SO FAT..." No matter how many times you told her she was beautiful she would always object, insisting that if you saw her in real life you would run the other way. Why not meet, you suggested, so that she could see how untrue that was.
She was radiant when she picked you up at the airport, a thousand times more beautiful than in the pictures. Her hands shook when you hugged and she apologized for being nervous. A few months later she confessed that she was shaking because she hadn't eaten for nearly three days before you arrived so that she wouldn't look bloated.
On her 26th birthday she shrieked when you tried to take a picture of her blowing out the candles. They were carefully arranged on top of a bowl of fruit salad because she doesn't eat cake.
You weren't allowed to grab her ass when you fucked or to run your hand along the inside of her thighs. Cellulite.
Next week when you leave her she'll cry so much that she will almost choke. You'll walk out anyway because you're tired of tuna for dinner and sex with the lights off. She'll whimper between sobs that she knew she didn't deserve you, she knew you were too good for someone like her, that she's hideous. One day she will meet someone who agrees, someone who will hit her just like her first boyfriend did.
http://scientificfacts.livejournal.com/?skip=10 |
1 comment:
Thank God not all girls are like that. I might have to take to the sheep fold.
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