'Valkyrie' is a Joke

I rented 'Valkyrie' because 'Synecdoche, New York' wasn't in stock. Forgive me.

The history behind the whole event interested me enough, but the story didn't make up for the terrible filmmaking. It was kind of like 'The Fellowship of the Rings' as directed by Michael Bay. Yech. How can you take such a beautiful, poignant thriller and dissolve it into such trash?

In fact, the whole movie was presented almost as a joke, a joke without a punchline. Since most people going into this film have an idea that this isn't how Hitler actually dies, they know how the film ends. Just like how everyone knew Obi-Wan couldn't fuck up too much in the Star Wars prequels; no matter what, he'll end up as a hermit on Tatooine. Which is to say, it's boring. With this type of movie, don't focus on plot tension, don't focus on the history so much as the drama, the paranoia and the general emotion of the characters.

Well, maybe that's what you get for hiring Bryan Singer to do the job stiff, dry story-telling and unmemorable dialogue. And placing Tom Cruise in the role of Germany's greatest hero wasn't the wisest choice either.

Despite being generally accurate historically, Valkyrie is an insult to the true conspirators.

Bad Design for Bland Bands

Anyone got an explanation why bands are now doing this boring, simplistic shit? I'll bet there's a dozen more albums just like this that came out recently.

Senescent Lost Cat / GarbageBand

I like to make music using GarbageBand, a simple Mac program that allows anyone to think they are talented, myself included. I know adding a few loops and strange sound effects doesn't make music good, but it's as good as I can do. Or maybe as good as I'm willing to put forth effort.

Anyway, I made a song with my sister in less than an hour, recording chipmunk voices and quoting lines from a lost cat poster. The poster looked like a really bad '80s rave dance party, so I made a really bad '80s rave dance song.

I have better songs I could talk about, but this is my most recent (and most inspired, probably).

You can download the song here and listen to more boring music at my MySpace.

http://www.gigasize.com/get.php?d=9t5nlktg9mc